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Aug 14, 2011

Give or Take?

I was walking along, on my way to school the other day -not in any particular burry at the time -and I realized something. People who look to give often have in abundance. Those who look to constantly take often have need or lacking.

As a simple example -someone in a rush, who is cutting people off, or pushing their way, not stopping to allow an elderly man or woman by... they are lacking in time. Whether it was by their control or not, people who are in a rush almost always feel like they are lacking time. They need to push ahead of others to get to their destination on time. I get the urge to do this often, and it takes a moment or two of thought to recognize that I'd rather be courteous than a few minutes early (or that I'd rather be a few minutes late than rude). Most people who feel like they have all the time in the world will give more freely of their time because, well, they have it in abundance.

And so it is with other things; those whose cups are overfilling, by and large, give and share. Those who are in need, who are lacking, do not. This, I believe, holds true in many realms; with material things such as money as well as less tangible things like time, effort and care.

And in many ways it is a matter of perspective. Those who experience themselves in need take, and those who experience themselves as having what they need in abundance may give. In that sense, it is strongly rooted in one's beliefs and attitude(s).

Another example that struck me is that the same holds true for respect. Those who have respect from others, who see themselves as respectable and respected by others will in turn respect others, while those who are less secure and feel a need to take or extract respect -to demand in order to receive -will put others down in order to raise their own esteem both in their own eyes and the eyes of others.

A simple and elegant thought, and yet it resonated so strongly with me.

And then, of course, I got to thinking what I'd rather have in a spouse: someone whose proverbial cup is consistently overflowing or perpetually thirsty in these different realms. Of course nobody is perfect, but it did get me wondering about what is more valuable to me and what I can/can't live with.


  1. I disagree. People who give do not always have a lot, it isnt a matter of quantity, it's a quality in itself. It's like being happy vs being happy only when things are going well.

  2. It's a concept I have heard before - that only those that respect themselves will be able to respect others. It goes with a few other emotions as well.